oh yes . i am very moody right now and i dont know who to talk with so i decided to on the computer in the middle of the night to post an entry .

honestly , no one can understand the bitterness of yours except God . only God can comfort you when you are alone . i always feel alone and the first person who i think of is God . i feel so lifeless , so empty sometimes . i always try to pretend stronger , tougher than i can be . at the end i get tired and cried to myself .

today , i would say , i realised a lot of thing . i realised , sometimes you may have the knowledge from the book more than people who dont get higher education , but this doesnt mean you can do better than them . they are actually more experienced than what we thought they were . they have the knowledge of life , the knowledge that you will never get to learn from book . they know so much more than what we thought . so , never look down at those peoples who dont really like to study , those so called , AH FEI ZAI . they are smarter in some senses .


i realised ,
you gotta be more independent sometimes . hoping for help from others is stupid . most of things in life you cannot hope for other people to help you , you gotta help yourself out from it , you gotta learn to settle it by your own . the bitterness , the suffers , no one can actually fully understand . they can only listen and comfort . at the end , you still have to jump out from the bitterness and start all over again .


i felt today . i am feeling so restless now .

i couldnt get a good rest yesterday night due to tiredness . i got too tired until i couldnt sleep . i think tonight its gonna be the same . pray for me :)

Labels: daily life, explosion of feelings