MISSPENGUIN is staring at the sky :):)

i cant believe ,
~~i failed my bm for very very first time !~~
lim ser kien told us that today .
it really spoiled my happy mood today after i heard ,
lagi satu orang dapat 38% ... kong lai yeee !
i was like , oh no ? i fail ? haha ?
lolx . feel much better now . luckily i managed to concentrated during sejarah paper if not for sure i will get killed . Thank God for it :)

why some people dont appreciate what we have done for them ?
like what YueeSun wrote in his blog . they just dont care . it really breaks my heart . they can just , IGONRE IT . awww ? that's pain . things that i have made an effort in it , i just cannot get what i wish for , EVERYTIME .

today , during recess , if i told you i aint sad that means i lied to you . sorry for being dishonest , i was trying to disguise my sadness on my face and smile . you may know i looked sad if you really CARE for me . not many people can do that . i felt sad isnt because i failed it . it reminded me of something . ~~PMO~~ , the one makes me always feels left out , misery , lonely , alone .... its like , i do everything all by myself . what i have done with all my heart , people just dont appreciate it . i tried my best to do it and yet i fail . God says , no one is a failure , so do i . i trying to comfort myself not to think negatively but the truth is telling me , ~~kong lai yee , you are a failure .~~ lyn knows all about this , even she cannot find any ways to change about it , she only listened to me . but that's enough for me . i try hard to get what i want but everytime i just cannot get it . why ? its not belongs to me ? NO . this is a something you need to make more effort on it . people didnt do so get MORE that it , me ? nothing and under NOTHING . im not emo , i feel so unfair .

i care for someone , i try my best to get it , i appreciate what people give me , i try to fit in in every situation i am , i try to spread all my happiness to all the people around me , i try to be nice to everyone , i try to not hate anyone , i try to not be that hot-tempered , i try to be patience , i try to be soft , i try to give hope to peoples who everyone doesnt hope anything from him/her , i try to not angry , i try to be happier than another day , i try to not cry easily , i try to be strong and tough , i try to share my experiences to everyone , i try to give suitable advices to those people who are down ...

i try to . what i have given out i dont wish i will get back anything . but at least something i have tried my best to get it and i will get it . this little hope . a very little small request , can they just make a really real smile after heard what i said , that wil be the best respon to me , that will be enough .

maybe there are some people care for me , but i ignored them , im sorry . tell me , i will try my best to treat you better :)

p.s. : i wanna blog about this long time ago . FINALLY .

Labels: explosion of feelings