seriously, nothing in life seems to be clear except what am i going to do the next day. everything is so blur and i cant help to live like a blur blur person. worries are useless so i may not look like i am worrying but sometimes i do. oh well, its my future, how can i not to worry? :) life like this, challenging me to hold strong, not too fall i guess.


there goes another interview of scholarship. hmmm. sometimes i just dont get it why they required us to wear formal, like office lady for the interview. we arent preparing interview to get a job. i mean, not casual but semi formal? maybe a skirt will be okay. hmmm. nevermind, i guess all interviews are over now. dont think there will be another calling me for another interview.


hmmm. living in a blur isnt good. so many things to worry about and yet so little space for my brain to work out :( im falling soon =\ im still standing strong each day passes is because God holds me. i really cannot imagine life with God when God is my everything. sometimes i just dont get it why my life is so much different from others that i know. WHY? life is unfair and i already accepted the fact, but, why there are so much mountains to climb? :(

seriously, i feel myself so weak. i hate moving on my life into another phase. it is just so hard for me to go through it. sometimes i really feel like crying out loudly to God but i dont do so. crying is so helpless, so pointless. if i cried could make everything easier, i would cry everyday, shed my tears til it is out of supply. so breathless :(


God wouldnt tell me the direction. He wouldnt. challenging my patience and confidence in him? i do have, i really do. but the blurness of vision makes me feel so scare, so scare everything will end up not so good. sigh. i need peace eh.

i should start to take picture with the peace sign so that i could have peace. XD



feeling of knowing someone is smiling because of your smile is good.
feeling of knowing someone is worrying for you when you are sick or down is good.
feeling of knowing someone is care for you when you feels like nobody is good.
feeling of knowing someone is thinking of you when their minds start to wondering is good. feeling of knowing someone will text you to make sure you have taken your daily meals is good.
feeling of knowing someone text you in the morning, ensuring you will start your day with a good mood is good.
feeling of knowing someone keeps asking you to go to bed early like your cute mama is good.
feeling of knowing someone checks out your statuses to know your daily mood is good.
feeling of knowing someone treats you like a precious stone is good.
feeling of knowing someone is always be there whenever you need someone to talk with.


this person is just like another family member of mine, makes me feels better by giving me the assurance when i have no confident :D

maybe, i have started to rely on this person from the beginning and i didnt realise =X

thank God that i have another person to rely on cause it is really hard to find this kind of person :D

human changes when time flies. this person might walk away one day because tired of me, i know i do make people tired. see my mama's face you will know. LOL!

p.s. : thank you :)

Labels: daily life, friends

i know i am a bit slow to update about my secondary school's graduation day but hey , i was sitting for spm . a good student like me , you know . hahahahha :D:D

well , we went to A&W which is near to taman jaya LRT station to have lunch after the graduation ceremony in school . it was very late due to ONE TEACHER who wanted to have her retirement ceremony on the same day with us . so smart uh ? == thanks to her . that day i didnt feel like i was actually leaving the school .

ok . enough for that crap . yes , i have taken lots of pictures :D


couldnt find the most awesome girl in my class , jieen's picture . aiks . nvm , i shall reveal her look in another entry of my blog . hahaha . my class is awesome ! gonna update about my class trip in langkawi and penang soon . :D

and today is jolee's birthday , which is our president of idiot group ! hahahahahahaha .

Labels: friends, school

it was another fun day ! i love being invited to her house for any events . i can have unlimited fun in her house . we went to shabu shabu for dinner and then went back to her house to cheong k ! haha it was really really fun .









went back home around 12 . it was another memorable night . we kept singing and singing . haha . watched MJ's concert after that , it was awesome !

p.s. : i have rashes on my shoulder , ITCHY ~~~

Labels: 2009, daily life, friends

yeah , today she is the queen of the world for one whole day .
yeah , the person is very close to me .
yeah , the person is my bestfriend , LYN




hope that our friendship will last very very long , unlimited period .
i know , we will always be ! :)

Labels: 2009, friends

that you are not alone , for i am here with you ,
though you're far way , i am here to stay .
you are not alone , for i am here with you ,
though we're far apart , you'll always in my heart .

wanted to blog about this long time ago but no inspiration . ok , the King of Pop , when his skin was still dark , black . to be honest , i know him since i was very young . i did listen to his songs , i know there was a guy called michael jackson and he can sing very well , never get to know about him , not really interested in him .

August 29, 1958(1958-08-29) - June 25, 2009 . he died at the age of 50 in US . he died on the same date with YeeSook , 25th , according to the time zone there . coincidence uh ? sometimes i do wonder will they meet each other in heaven ? they might have the chance to dance together since both of them like to dance right ? besides that , the way they talked was so soft , their voices , it just soften your heart easily . suddenly , i really miss him so much =|

ok , back to MJ . he is just another great man , talented man who sent by God . some even say he is an angel who sent by God , come to earth to remind us about the world . like the song , heal the world ?

heal the world , make it better place ,
for you and for me and the entire human race ,
they are people dying , if you care enough for this living ,
make a better place for you and for me .

yeah , FOR YOU AND FOR ME . after his death , i started to search all his things , all his details and so on , started to know more about him . he loves children , SO MUCH . he cares for them . i guess , he doesnt have childhood ? he built another 'Neverland' which so beautiful and dream of all children . he wasnt a person like those people who said , molesting children and so on . SERIOUSLY , i will never believe . a person like him who cares so much for children wouldnt do this kind of thing , he wouldnt hurt a child . i think , he wanted to be a child again ?

We are the world , We are the children
We are the ones who make a brighter day
So let's start giving
There's a choice we're making
We're saving our own lives
It's true we'll make a better day
Just you and me ~

for sure , i do like all his dances . it's so cool and unique . he is talented and this is the fact . his moonwalk was awesome . too bad , i cant see it with my own eyes and i will never have the chance . if you really love music , you will love his music despite that his look really ugly . these are all the effects of went for depigment operation and plastic surgeries . who cares that he did many plastic surgeries . there is nothing wrong for being perfectionist , wanted to be perfect and wanted perfections in his life . he was trying to look better . he wanted to stay on the stage as long as he could . IS THERE ANY WRONG ? NO ! i feel sad , i really do . he is born to be on that stage . he is another angel who sent by God . i have watched his memorial in the staples centre . i cried . Jackson's 11-year-old daughter, Paris Katherine, cried as she told the crowd, "Ever since I was born, Daddy has been the best father you could ever imagine ... I just wanted to say I love him so much."

i love his smile . it is so sweet , dont you feel the same ? it truly comes from his heart . God had taken him to another world to have a better life because we human here on earth dont appreciate him . one thing , i'm not his fans , this is true . i just want to talk about my feelings for him . i feel bad , i only come to know more about him after his death . im so bad =|

do you know why i want to be a psychologist ? i want to save the people in this people , i wanna make this world become a safe world , a world where no evil peoples in , save the children from being abused by their parents , give them an unforgettable childhood , let them enjoy it . children deserve to have a better life . they have their own rights to play , to experience things that adult can never experience . WE SHOULDNT TAKE THE CHILDHOOD FROM THEM , if we do so we are making their beginning of life empty . MJ is my example , the head of the point , i wanted to be like him , save the children , heal the world , telling all the children in the world you are not alone and i will be with you always . i wanted to continue what he did and even do it better than he did .


after all , today should be a happy day .



p.s. : i wanted to donate blood after reading the book Thanks For The Memories by Cecelia Ahern . i might have the chance to experience what the women experienced ! it's happen like dejavu ~~

Labels: 2009, friends

YES , i shall update my blog before the school holidays end . seriously , today is friday ! OMG ! WHY TIME FLIES THAT FAST ?! IM GONNA MISS YOU HOLIDAYY ! :(

went to church camp . not gonna type out all the activities we had like the ISABELLE TEH . :D the camp was fun and i really enjoyed it . God answered me all my prayers in the camp , amazing isnt it ? God knows what i want and what i need . He really shows me the way to walk without feeling afraid . YEAH , HE IS GOD LEH ! :D

let the photos talk in it's very special way ! :D:D





haha . we did some emo candid shots . bel wanted to . so we all took emo photos in front of many peoples . HAHA :D






YES . these following three pictures , guess who they are . it is so obvious . lol







do you realise one thing , REUBEN PAK was in the background of DAVID's photo . three out of four . ==


we actually chit-chat-ing until three in the morning . haha . got to know many things about all the youth . i actually got a new name called PASTOR KONG too . haha . sounds very nice right ? WOOOW , i may be a pastor one day .. lol .

p.s. : i need to study . first paper is add math and second paper is physic paper 2 . =X

p.p.s. : i saw many things . i have actually knew the truth but there are still a few thing that make me doubt about it .

p.p.p.s. : do you know you unlike any other , you always be my thunder , so bring on the rain ~

Labels: 2009, crap, daily life, friends